You Know You're From Montreal When...

I just received this from a friend in Montreal. Having lived there myself, I know the inside scoop on several, though not all of them!

You Know You're From Montreal When...

1. You pronounce it "Muntreal", not "Mahntreal".
2. You have ever said anything like "I have to stop at the guichet before we get to the dep."
3. Your only concern about jaywalking is getting a ticket.
4. You agree that Montreal drivers are crazy, but you're secretly proud of their nerves of steel.
5. The most exciting thing about the South Shore is that you can turn right on a red.
6. You know that the West Island is not a separate geographical formation.
7. You refer to Tremblant as "up North."
8. You know how to pronounce Pie IX.
9. You greet everyone, from lifelong bosom friends to some one you met once a few years ago, with a two-cheek kiss.
10. You know at least one person who works for the CBC, and at least one other person who used to work for Nortel.
11. You've been hearing Celine Dion jokes longer than anyone else.
12. You cringe when Bob Cole pronounces French hockey player names.
13. You were drinking cafe-au-lait before it was a latte.
14. You order fries 'with sauce', not 'with gravy'.
15. Shopper's Drug Mart is Pharmaprix and Staples is Bureau en Gros, and PFK is finger lickin' good.
16. For two weeks a year, you are a jazz aficionado.
17. You need to be reminded by prominent signage that you should wait for the green light.
18. Everyone on the street - drivers, pedestrians, and cyclists - think they're immortal, and that you'll move first.
19. You know the difference between the SQ, the SAQ, and the SAAQ.
20. You measure temperature and distance in metric, but weight and height in Imperial measure.
21. You show up at a party at 11 p.m. and no one else is there yet.
22. You don't drink pop or soda, you drink soft drinks.
23. The margarine in your fridge is the same color as lard.
24. Every once in a while, you wonder whatever happened to Luba.
25. You never thought that Corey Hart was cool, but you know someone whose cousin dated him.
26. There has to be at least 30 cm of snow on the ground in less than 24 hours for you to consider it too snowy to drive.
27. You remember where you were during the Ice Storm.
28. You used to be an Expos fan, but now all you really miss is Youppi.
29. You don't understand anyone from Lac-St-Jean, but you can fake the accent.
30. You discuss potholes like most people discuss weather.
31. While watching an American made-for-TV movie, you realize that "Vienna" is actually Old Montreal, that "New York" is actually downtown and that the "The Futuristic City" is actually Habitat '67.
32. You find it amusing when people from outside Quebec compliment you on how good your English is.
33. You have yet to understand a single announcement made on the Metro PA system, no matter what the language.
34. You think of Old Montreal as nothing but a bunch of over-priced restaurants, old buildings and badly paved streets.
35. You don't find Non-Quebec comedians speaking "gibberish" French even remotely funny.
36. You don't find it weird that there's a strip club on every corner downtown.
37. You like your pizza all-dressed