Recipe on How to be a Phoney

David Berner clued me into this video. I have a different, personal take on it. First though, watch the video.

I've never liked Chris Matthews. He's one of those so-called journalists who is more concerned about his own fame than anything else. His questions often go on for 30+ seconds. He's not really interested in the answers his guests give him. In Canada we have several on TV and on the radio too.

His book seems to be an accurate representation of his view of the world: Power and fame and getting what you want are what life is all about. Doing whatever it takes, including feigning sincerity, is perfectly fine as long as your end goal is met. Helping others and expecting nothing in return is just foolish.

It's taken me a long time to realize that some people, perhaps a growing number, think exactly this way. They may constitute the majority of the so-called elites of our society, but they're a troubled lot. Imagine what it must be like to live one's life when nothing is sincere and real. If and when one hits hard times, it's pretty clear that such people will never be there for you; superficially maybe, but not actually.

This past year I deliberately cut out of my life several people who I felt were of the same mindset as this. None of them are "bad" people, but in each case, I strongly felt that they came to each meeting, to each discussion with a specific agenda. I was simply a conduit to helping them acquire what they wanted, which was most often a connection or an introduction.

Certainly, we all want and need things at different times in our lives. But aren't friendships and companionships and relationships supposed to mean something more than "what's in it for me"?

Perhaps it's a necessary and healthy exercise every once in a while to examine each person in your life and ask yourself, "Are they only here because they want sex or money or connections or power?" If so, pruning is definitely the order of the day!