A New Nation is Born

There were 43 Presidents of the United States of America:

(POTUS = President of the United States)

Now there is the First President of the United States of Apology:

(POTA = President of the Apology)

Full explanation here. And even more here.

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An anonymous source within the White House said, "No one apologizes quite like Barack. He's so brave!"

Reporter: "What's so brave about it?"

Anonymous source: "Well, well . . . it just is. Anyhow, doesn't he look so good when he's apologizing?!?"

Foot in the Mouth Disease

My mom and I were giving Danny a driving tour of Vancouver. We stopped at a Tim Horton's, where I ran in to get a couple of beverages. I knew they had 4 sizes but had forgotten the size of each.

So I walked up to the female cashier and when she asked what I wanted, I [completely innocently] responded, "Yes, what cup sizes do you have?"

I don't know if she sensed the unintentional double-entendre but I blushed profusely!

Could there be anything more uncomfortable?

A female friend of mine recently sent me this e-mail. Put yourself in her place:

So dad and I check into the Westin Saturday and around 10:30 that night we start to hear "uh, uh, ohhhh, ohhhh" and I'm just about ready to die from embarrassment, I mean I'm in bed, dad is in the bed next to me and he says "whaddya think that is? Har har" Ummm, yeah, dad, there's a cat in heat next door and then I turn up the TV REALLY loud to drown it out, about 10 minutes later I turn it down and then I hear "uh, uh, oooh, oooh", damn this lady has stamina! Next morning, same thing, next night, there she goes again. Thankfully, she either wore herself out or checked out for the last 2 nights....